The anti-definition of happiness.

What is happiness? According to the Merriam-Webster dictionary, happiness is a state of well-being and contentment, a satisfying experience. According to Mahatma Gandhi "Happiness is when what you think, what you say, and what you do are in harmony."

Harmony? Happiness? There are so difficult to define, and to pursuit; it lasts a second, an instant.  Last time I remember I was especially happy I was cleaning the snow after a storm that lasts three days. However, it’s obvious that I don’t need two feet of snow to feel happy, but there were all the necessary ingredients for me to feel happy: companion, laughs, fun.

I have not enough knowledge, years, or wisdom to define happiness or harmony. Then, I will look for the anti-definition of my happiness, I mean a list of all the things that scare the elusive happiness.

I understand that the definition as well the anti-definition of happiness cannot be a unique definition that fits for every person; so I do not pretend my anti-definition makes sense to anybody else. I think each one should be the sherpa at the own pursuit of happiness.

Disclaimers are done, let's back to the anti-definition, and the question is "What things make me unhappy?"

I completed a list:

The absent of the different aspects that I listed do not ensure happiness, but without a doubt, I could not define me happy in the presence of any of them. Now my strategy will be focused on avoiding these aspects on my life. I included some activities that might help to avoid each aspect.

Looking these activities I will incorporate them to my personal objectives (If you have not read about them here is the link); but I also created a wheel with some activities that contribute to creating the appropriate environment to feel happy, the purpose is to spin the wheel and every day do something that helps me to be happy.

Happiness is elusive, but at least I will try to put the ingredients on the table, and maybe an instant of happiness would appear.


References

Merriam-Webster. Happiness. https://www.merriam-webster.com/dictionary/happiness

Objectives: Looking for a new direction. How to set new (but integral) goals? (Part 2)

Have you created your goal wheel? If not go to the first part of this post.

Now that you have created your goal wheel, it is important to define a goal and objectives for each aspect.

Sounds complicated? It is not!

Let define first our goals, for each aspect of your goal wheel, write what do you want happen to this aspect. The following table shows examples:

 Now is time to define objectives! An objective could be defined as that steps that contribute to the goal.

According to Doran, an objective should be SMART: Specific, Measurable, Achievable, Relevant and Time-bound. If well, Doran wrote it thinking on business, this methodology can be applied also to the personal goals.

Specific means that the objective should be strategic for the goal. Look for the activities that contribute directly to the aspect. For example, if your goal is to lose weight, your objective should include activities that contribute to your goal, as running, avoid saturated fats, etc.

Measurable means that each objective should be measured. Examples of measuring could be miles, pounds, times.

Achievable, if an objective cannot be achievable, the goal cannot be achievable, and then need to be redefined. You can define difficult goals, yes, but try to define a goal that can be achievable in this year.

Relevant, the objective must contribute to the achievement of the goal. Sounds obvious? It is better to be sure the objectives contribute to the goals.

Time-bound, you can define to lose 10 pounds, but this objective will not be effective until you add a time to achieve it. It is not the same to lose 10 pounds in 4 months than 10 years.

Define your objectives might require to think about them several times, or well discuss them with others. For example, if you are planning to call your siblings every week, you will need to check with them if they are available.

The following table show some examples:

Now try to define your goals and objectives!



Doran, G. T. (1981). "There's a S.M.A.R.T. way to write management's goals and objectives". Management Review. AMA FORUM. 70 (11): 35–36.

Goals: Looking for a new direction. How to set new (but integral) goals? (Part 1)

January. OK. I have still almost 350 opportunities to have a worth year, 360 different angles for my next step. It's easy to feel lost, but that is a mood that we need to avoid.

Then it's time to set the goals for this year!!!!

First, let talk about you. You are an integral person with different interests, edges, and moods, then it is normal to not have a unique goal in your life. I know there are people who put a single goal in their lives as entrepreneurs, inventors, writers, philanthropists; however, we need to recognize that they abandoned other aspects of life in order to pursue a single goal.

I divided the different aspects of a common person (as me) where I would like to improve myself. I am considering four basic aspects of my life: Me, Family, Work, and Community. Each of this aspects can be divided into more specific aspects. After thinking about it, I created my goal wheel as follows:

Now for each aspect, I will define a goal for this year. For example In the family aspect, extended family I want to strengthen my relationship with my siblings. That is not an easy goal, we all live in different countries, but today I will not worry about the how; I just going to think in my goals and contemplate them with a nice cup of tea.